Into the Future

Dolly is 6-months-old.  I'm starting to worry about going back to work - now that I'm officially mid-way through my parental leave.  I don't really know what I want to do with my career. Meaning, I'm not really sure what I want to be when I grow up.  Before I had kids I would have described myself as a 'driven' woman.  I worked at school with all my gusto - I went all the way, earning the Ph.D. However, once that happened, I got pregnant with Mister about 3 months after walking across the stage to receive that Ph.D., which now hangs on my wall in the living room.  A shift in priorities occurred and I found that once Mister arrived that I was more concerned about work-family balance than bringing home the bigger pay cheque or getting the corner office.   I did a major job switch after having Mister (when I went back to work after the leave) to find a better job with more benefits in preparation for baby #2.  The thing is, I don't particularly love this job. So the thought about returning to it is not enticing.  Why am I bringing this up? Well, I had a bridal shower for one of my best friends on the weekend. I hired a Tarot Reader (a really well-known one in Toronto) to come do cards.  Her reading for me basically consisted of the following: I would quit my job, stay at home, be my own boss doing something along the lines of writing or teaching and take care of my kids myself.  The thought of leaving my job scares me to death.  I'm still absorbing this information. I guess I have 6 more months to think this through.  In the meantime, I ponder what the future will bring and what my goals or aspirations are now -- other than to be happy, to be a wonderful mom, wife, daughter, and friend.

Spring is Here!!

My little piglet (aka Dolly) turns 6-months-old this week.  I have been reflecting on all that has happened in the last 6 months.  She is growing into a little person.  It feels like she finally woke up this last month - becoming much more interactive - smiling, laughing and babbling at me.  There is still some concern that she might need glasses (I guess a common thing about preemies) - but I found out yesterday that the specialist waiting list is 8 months.  She could be in daycare by the time we see someone.  I started Dolly on solids recently and she seems to enjoy them - mouth wide open, waiting for her Oatmeal and Sweet Potatoes.  I just love her to bits.  I wish she would sleep more though ... she seems to be on a sleep strike. Her brother (Mister) is doing much better in the sleep department.  Seems to have adapted to having a little sister around and seems more secure with us lately.  The only battle with Mister is the one with him, us and the potty.  He just turned three and is one of three kids in his preschool room still in diapers.  I'm trying a new strategy based on a book called "Potty Train Your Child in One Day".  I'll have to post if it works or not!!  I've even ordered the Boy Corolle Potty Doll for $50 - but hey, if it works it is worth the investment from what I would save in pull-ups.  

And so where am I at 6-moths post-partum? I was looking at some of my posts and they seem a bit gloomy.  I finally started meds for my thyroid problem - it has been a long up-hill battle since 2005 with lots of needles and monitoring and decisively figuring out that I do have post-pregnancy thryoiditis as well as the auto-immune disease Hashimoto's.  The thyroid pill will help my slow thyroid (hypo- ... although earlier tests post-pregnancy revealed a fast thyroid ... guess that is how it goes with post-pregnancy thyoriditis - it cycles and they can only medicate the slow phase).  Nonetheless I should start feeling more energy, losing the baby weight and less depressed.  Yeah for the happy pill! Weight Watchers is working slowly - so far I have lost 12 lbs in 8 weeks.  Dolly is calling me ... until next time.